So far, I have only met with one POT. One word: DISASTUH.
This POT was one I had not mentioned in this blog. He seemed nice at first, but became clingy and rude and just ughhhhhh. Not my cuppa! He looked attractive in his pictures, though, so I gave him the benefit of the doubt. MISTAKE. Haha.
I got lost a few times when heading to our agreed upon place, so I was a little bit late. The entire time, he was getting frustrated with me, and though I don't blame him, he had me going somewhere I was completely unfamiliar with, in the middle of a huge rainstorm, super late at night.
We had talked on the phone beforehand, so I wasn't super uncomfortable, just kind of nonplussed by his abrasiveness - asking me if he could get a hotel room. I tell him to do whatever he wants, but we need to talk and work out our arrangement first. He says he can probably give me a few grand a month and I say okay.
I finally get there, and pulling into the parking lot, I see him standing. I know sometimes people use pictures from a few years ago, but his seriously had to be from a few decades ago. So ridic.
Forgiving that, I'm here, so I get out and he hugs me and yada yada yada. It's freezing and I really don't want to get in his car, and don't want him in mine, so I agree to go up to the room with him.
He starts getting a little bit touchy so I pull away and say we need to talk first. I ask him how he wants this all to work. He says he will give me money every time he sees me...wait...
I ask him how that works. He reiterates, telling me that he would give me a few hundred every time we have sex. I sternly remind him that I am not a hooker. I am not a prostitute. That is not how an arrangement works. He gets mad and says "Well, maybe we should leave." I agree and I turn to walk out. He then tells me he'll give me 150 to sleep with me. HELL NO! The nerve of some people, I swear. Knowing he won't go for it, I tell him 500. He says 200. I say 500 again. He says 250, then 300. I tell him what he is offering me is not the kind of arrangement I am seeking, and walk to my car. He follows me, and tells me "You drove all this way. You should just come upstairs with me for 10 minutes and I will give you 300. Don't miss out. You're wasting a good opportunity."
Um, no. I am leaving a misleading asshole using decades-old pictures who wants a hooker, not a true arrangement with someone I am actually attracted to. Fuck off.
I tell him maybe we will meet up another day, but I have not contacted him, nor has he contacted me. I am not at all regretful that I said no. I am actually extremely proud of myself for doing that.I will never compromise myself like that.
EDIT: He texted me about an hour ago. I have since blocked him. He's a John, not an SD.
Tuesday, December 13, 2011
Thursday, December 8, 2011
4. [Pots and Pans]
Today I was supposed to meet up with the Stealth Blonde. This was contingent on a few other factors, the first of which was my transportation situation, but my car repairs are running behind schedule (of course), and here I am, carless. I have not ever been without a car, and it sucks. Sucks sucks sucks sucks SUCKS! Stealth Blonde was more than accommodating (he seems so sweet!) and we simply rescheduled.
Dr. Kevorkian insisted on his terms, and though I can't fault him for it, I know he is not the SD for me. I respectfully bid him adieu and wished him the best of luck on his search.
Don Juan has been extremely attentive and proactive in this situation. He and I are having lunch tomorrow at a place near my work. I am so excited! He sounds ready to please in all ways, and I can't wait to partake. Our conversations are so naughtily witty. He told me he's not used to dealing with such an intelligent SB, and it shows. I love not only keeping up with him, but catching him off guard. He says he is going to spoil me tomorrow...I'm so excited :)
There is also a new pot on the horizon! I shall call him...Captain Needles. He is relatively young, at 40, and looks so much younger! He lives in one of my all time favorite cities...that is a definite plus haha. I have a type, even in dating, and Captain Needles here fits it to a T. As a petite Latina, with dark eyes, dark hair, olive skin, and a slim bod, I find myself attracted to tall, blonde, green/blue eyed, educated older White men. Mmmm Captain Needles, you are in quite a bit of trouble here ;)
SA is such an upgrade from SD...I have already found so many quality men! Even more in two days on SA than the FOUR MONTHS I paid for on SD. Never again. Don't ever pay for a membership! Expensive lesson learned.
Dr. Kevorkian insisted on his terms, and though I can't fault him for it, I know he is not the SD for me. I respectfully bid him adieu and wished him the best of luck on his search.
Don Juan has been extremely attentive and proactive in this situation. He and I are having lunch tomorrow at a place near my work. I am so excited! He sounds ready to please in all ways, and I can't wait to partake. Our conversations are so naughtily witty. He told me he's not used to dealing with such an intelligent SB, and it shows. I love not only keeping up with him, but catching him off guard. He says he is going to spoil me tomorrow...I'm so excited :)
There is also a new pot on the horizon! I shall call him...Captain Needles. He is relatively young, at 40, and looks so much younger! He lives in one of my all time favorite cities...that is a definite plus haha. I have a type, even in dating, and Captain Needles here fits it to a T. As a petite Latina, with dark eyes, dark hair, olive skin, and a slim bod, I find myself attracted to tall, blonde, green/blue eyed, educated older White men. Mmmm Captain Needles, you are in quite a bit of trouble here ;)
SA is such an upgrade from SD...I have already found so many quality men! Even more in two days on SA than the FOUR MONTHS I paid for on SD. Never again. Don't ever pay for a membership! Expensive lesson learned.
Wednesday, December 7, 2011
3. [My Newest Quest for a Pot of Gold]
Only one day back in my illustrious (not really) sugar career, and I already have a few pots :)
1. Don Juan
One word: LOTHARIO. He is totally handsome, overtly sexual, and seemingly ready to spoil. We have plans to meet up tomorrow - hopefully he is what he makes himself out to be.
2. Stealth Blonde
Stealth Blonde is looking for something very discreet. Right up my alley! He is smart, he is funny, and he is pretty damn sexy! I have a thing for tall blondes. The only issue is that he is trying to offer me substantially less than I want/need. The upside is that he is VERY local. No real travel needed. Maybe I'll keep this one for fun money and only see him once in awhile ;)
3. Dr. Kevorkian
Dr. Kevorkian is slightly insistent and slightly demanding for what he wants to offer me. He expects a lot, but this baby is not going to be lowballed!
Time is precious and valuable, and if I can make more at work than I would in the course of a month with an SD, I'm not really interested.
1. Don Juan
One word: LOTHARIO. He is totally handsome, overtly sexual, and seemingly ready to spoil. We have plans to meet up tomorrow - hopefully he is what he makes himself out to be.
2. Stealth Blonde
Stealth Blonde is looking for something very discreet. Right up my alley! He is smart, he is funny, and he is pretty damn sexy! I have a thing for tall blondes. The only issue is that he is trying to offer me substantially less than I want/need. The upside is that he is VERY local. No real travel needed. Maybe I'll keep this one for fun money and only see him once in awhile ;)
3. Dr. Kevorkian
Dr. Kevorkian is slightly insistent and slightly demanding for what he wants to offer me. He expects a lot, but this baby is not going to be lowballed!
Time is precious and valuable, and if I can make more at work than I would in the course of a month with an SD, I'm not really interested.
Tuesday, December 6, 2011
2. [The Accidental Sugar Baby and How She Got Burned]
My first foray into the world of sugar was a complete travesty, to say the very least.
I had responded to an ad seeking a sugar baby on CL. I have to admit, it wasn't the sugar that initially lured me in - it was the intellectual attraction that I held to this professional, who, as I later learned was nothing but a character played by a con man.
In this ad, the man described himself as a professional, educated, son of a diplomat, who had just signed a 6-figure book deal in photojournalism. There are red flags all over that description, I now realize, but dumb and naive little me was so interested in the prospect of being (and finding!) an intellectual muse that I suppose I glossed over that entirely.
There were red flags all over our initial meeting.
He set up a stipend - but alas, he banks internationally, so he has to call his barrister to set it up. He asked me to set up another account, put some money it, and he would deposit 7k. I did, but he didn't.
I was 18 at this point, living out on my own for the first time, with no help from home. Safe to say I was under financial duress, and maybe because of it, I looked the other way on several fishy things.
1) He showed up to our first meeting in a cab. Not inherently weird, but no one takes cabs in Southern California.
2) He didn't have a permanent residence out here, always saying he was "visiting" and staying on friends' sailboats or tenements.
3) He talked about all the things he had, yet was very stingy, and displayed no real signs of wealth.
4) He never rented a hotel room or ate at a more upscale restaurant.
5) He asked and expected me to drive him home (hours away!) with not even as much as gas money.
After promise after promise with this man, and the constant empty hands, I finally went off on him. He promised (surprise) that he would be sending me a Mac laptop for school with all the amenities. I gave him my mailing address (not my home one). It never came, and he disappeared.
I, babies, was a sucker, but it taught me a lot. Some advice:
1. If it sounds too good to be true, it probably is. Again, for emphasis. IF IT SOUNDS TOO GOOD TO BE TRUE, IT PROBABLY IS.
2. While you can't make someone keep their promise, you can limit your time wasted on them. Cut your losses sooner, rather than later. Trust me, you'll find another, even better daddy just around the corner ;)
3. If you don't feel comfortable doing something, say it. If a daddy truly cares for you, he will understand. This does NOT mean act like an entitled diva and be completely close-minded, but if you are really not okay with doing something/going somewhere, vocalize it and explain why.
4. Look for signs. Note cars, clothes, tips they leave, where they eat, etc; This is generally indicative of the kind of means a person possesses.
5. Ask a lot of questions, but make sure you hear details in the answers. Get timelines. Ask a background. Google names, email addresses, whatever you have been given. Verification is the name of the game.
Don't get suckered by some creepy old man trying to take advantage of a young and beautiful girl such as yourself. Empty promises (and wallets!) are just that - empty. If you keep hearing words but see no action, it is time to move on. Don't hold on to a pipe dream.
“Keep your eyes on the stars, and your feet on the ground.”
- Theodore Roosevelt
I had responded to an ad seeking a sugar baby on CL. I have to admit, it wasn't the sugar that initially lured me in - it was the intellectual attraction that I held to this professional, who, as I later learned was nothing but a character played by a con man.
In this ad, the man described himself as a professional, educated, son of a diplomat, who had just signed a 6-figure book deal in photojournalism. There are red flags all over that description, I now realize, but dumb and naive little me was so interested in the prospect of being (and finding!) an intellectual muse that I suppose I glossed over that entirely.
There were red flags all over our initial meeting.
He set up a stipend - but alas, he banks internationally, so he has to call his barrister to set it up. He asked me to set up another account, put some money it, and he would deposit 7k. I did, but he didn't.
I was 18 at this point, living out on my own for the first time, with no help from home. Safe to say I was under financial duress, and maybe because of it, I looked the other way on several fishy things.
1) He showed up to our first meeting in a cab. Not inherently weird, but no one takes cabs in Southern California.
2) He didn't have a permanent residence out here, always saying he was "visiting" and staying on friends' sailboats or tenements.
3) He talked about all the things he had, yet was very stingy, and displayed no real signs of wealth.
4) He never rented a hotel room or ate at a more upscale restaurant.
5) He asked and expected me to drive him home (hours away!) with not even as much as gas money.
After promise after promise with this man, and the constant empty hands, I finally went off on him. He promised (surprise) that he would be sending me a Mac laptop for school with all the amenities. I gave him my mailing address (not my home one). It never came, and he disappeared.
I, babies, was a sucker, but it taught me a lot. Some advice:
1. If it sounds too good to be true, it probably is. Again, for emphasis. IF IT SOUNDS TOO GOOD TO BE TRUE, IT PROBABLY IS.
2. While you can't make someone keep their promise, you can limit your time wasted on them. Cut your losses sooner, rather than later. Trust me, you'll find another, even better daddy just around the corner ;)
3. If you don't feel comfortable doing something, say it. If a daddy truly cares for you, he will understand. This does NOT mean act like an entitled diva and be completely close-minded, but if you are really not okay with doing something/going somewhere, vocalize it and explain why.
4. Look for signs. Note cars, clothes, tips they leave, where they eat, etc; This is generally indicative of the kind of means a person possesses.
5. Ask a lot of questions, but make sure you hear details in the answers. Get timelines. Ask a background. Google names, email addresses, whatever you have been given. Verification is the name of the game.
Don't get suckered by some creepy old man trying to take advantage of a young and beautiful girl such as yourself. Empty promises (and wallets!) are just that - empty. If you keep hearing words but see no action, it is time to move on. Don't hold on to a pipe dream.
“Keep your eyes on the stars, and your feet on the ground.”
- Theodore Roosevelt
Monday, December 5, 2011
1.
Growing up, I was never surrounded by opulence.
I was born to teenage parents. My father left before my 3rd birthday, and popped in and out of my life intermittently (hence the attraction to older men - an inherent sense of stability), leaving my mother to work and me to be raised by my grandparents.
This is not an unconventional family system for my culture, both fortunately and unfortunately, as I'm sure many Hispanics can attest to. However disadvantaged my youth may seem, however, I must admit, I had an exceptional childhood.
My grandparents stressed hard work and education above all. My grandfather had worked for a cement company until he retired, and was very frugal with his spending. He amassed an impressive sum over the course of his career and didn't leave my family hurting by any stretch of the imagination.
My grandparents also instilled a very strong educational work ethic in me. They read to me every time I asked and every chance I got, igniting within me a desire to learn which will never be satisfied. That desire brought me here.
All around us are ads and marketing and labels and success stories and Cinderella stories and big pictures. I don't want to experience things secondhand. I want to see and feel and touch and taste and write. More than anything, I want to be able to write about what I've seen and done. I don't want to simply observe. I want to experience.
I want to live, not just comfortably, but richly. Not material things like purses and shoes. I want something less tangible and more memorable. I can't put "Owns 6 pair of Louboutins" on a resume, nor would I ever want to, but something like "Has traveled extensively; adept at cultural immersion" - now that would move some units.
Higher learning is expensive, and because I opted to go against what and where my family wanted me to attend university, I am paying for it all myself. Working full-time and going to school full-time is not for the faint of heart.
This is where it gets interesting: in order to alleviate some of my burden, I turned to a Sugar Daddy website.
Two, in fact.
One had mixed results (of which I will recount, in later posts of course!) and now a new one, one I am hoping will bring me less pretenders. I now have the beautiful gift of experience riding shotgun, so who knows where this will take me?
(Spoiler alert: hopefully grad school!)
I was born to teenage parents. My father left before my 3rd birthday, and popped in and out of my life intermittently (hence the attraction to older men - an inherent sense of stability), leaving my mother to work and me to be raised by my grandparents.
This is not an unconventional family system for my culture, both fortunately and unfortunately, as I'm sure many Hispanics can attest to. However disadvantaged my youth may seem, however, I must admit, I had an exceptional childhood.
My grandparents stressed hard work and education above all. My grandfather had worked for a cement company until he retired, and was very frugal with his spending. He amassed an impressive sum over the course of his career and didn't leave my family hurting by any stretch of the imagination.
My grandparents also instilled a very strong educational work ethic in me. They read to me every time I asked and every chance I got, igniting within me a desire to learn which will never be satisfied. That desire brought me here.
All around us are ads and marketing and labels and success stories and Cinderella stories and big pictures. I don't want to experience things secondhand. I want to see and feel and touch and taste and write. More than anything, I want to be able to write about what I've seen and done. I don't want to simply observe. I want to experience.
I want to live, not just comfortably, but richly. Not material things like purses and shoes. I want something less tangible and more memorable. I can't put "Owns 6 pair of Louboutins" on a resume, nor would I ever want to, but something like "Has traveled extensively; adept at cultural immersion" - now that would move some units.
Higher learning is expensive, and because I opted to go against what and where my family wanted me to attend university, I am paying for it all myself. Working full-time and going to school full-time is not for the faint of heart.
This is where it gets interesting: in order to alleviate some of my burden, I turned to a Sugar Daddy website.
Two, in fact.
One had mixed results (of which I will recount, in later posts of course!) and now a new one, one I am hoping will bring me less pretenders. I now have the beautiful gift of experience riding shotgun, so who knows where this will take me?
(Spoiler alert: hopefully grad school!)
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